Seeing red
by Jennan
Summary: Edward can control himself. But what about the others...
1. Accident

**A glimpse of my new story. :D Hope you like it.  
**

"What have I done?" The blood flows from the small, crescent shape wound on her neck. She has a horrified look in her deep brown eyes. Breathing heavily she staggers backwards and falls to the snowy ground.

"You…you bit me?" She raises her hand up to the wound and feels the blood. Wet and slick as it quickly coats her neck. It starts seeping into her blue sweater. I can't help but think of when I first saw her wearing it. _Such a beautiful color_. I had thought and now here it was, soaked in her blood, as I watch her mortal life come to a screeching halt.

She stands up and screams unexpectedly. "My neck! Its on fire!" She crumples back to the earth, I can hear her heart beat quickening. I try to quiet her.

"Sssh It'll be okay!" I contemplate picking her up. Bringing her home, so she won't be heard. But I can't get close to her. She's nearly 10 yards away but the smell of her blood is so strong. My throat burns and I nearly cry out in agony. She lets out another distressed yell and I can't stand it any longer.

_I can't believe I got so close to her throat_. The sound of the blood pulsing through her veins. She smelled so good I couldn't help myself. I latched on so quickly there was no time for her to react, she let out a surprised gasp and that was all. I got a good mouthful of blood and swallowed. I had another before I was able to force myself away. I bolted in the opposite direction.

"I'm so sorry!" I had yelled desperately. It didn't help.

She stared at me in shock. "Emmett!"

And now she would become one of us. Edward is going to rip me to shreds. My thoughts flashed to Rosalie… My Rosalie, what would she do to me?

"Hello? Is everything okay over there?" A strange voice called from across the field. I snapped out of my day dream.

"Shit!" I say too loudly.

I take a deep breath and in a second I'm at Bella's side. Her eyes were wide with shock and agony as I gather her in my arms, she's in so much pain she has no strength to fight me, not that it would do any good anyways. I take off running. _Carlisle will know what to do_. I hope desperately as Bella's body writhes in my arms. I feel awful. I knock the door right off its hinges since I have no free hand to open it.

Esme runs in with a concerned look on her face, but quickly covers her nose and runs back out. I hear her telling my 'siblings' to stay out of the front room, the smell is so strong. Carlisle appears at the doorway. I can't speak. Bella screams again and it tells him everything he needs to know. He takes her from me and lays her carefully on the couch and gets to work.

"What have you done?!" Edward's voice booms from where he stands behind me. Bella's eyes roll back and her flailing stops abruptly. Edward takes one look at her limp body and lunges at me demanding an explanation.

The only words I can form come out in a rush.

"It was an accident, Edward."


	2. Temptation

**Minutes earlier.**

"Shoot!" Once again I am cursing my old beat up truck. "Come one! Start!" I command as I turn the key. It wheezes and a thick black smoke starts leaking into the cab. I cough and rip the key out. Stumbling out of the truck I slam the door with excessive force, letting out a frustrated growl. I look around at the empty school parking lot. The wind plays with the end of my scarf and I sigh. I reach into my pocket and pull out the oversized cell phone Charlie had given me.

"Just in case of emergencies." He said as he handed it to me. It was ugly and awkward to carry. Luckily my jacket pockets were large enough to fit the monstrous thing. I thanked him and gave him an awkward hug.

I stare at the tiny glowing screen. It politely tells me the time and the battery level, as I rub my finger over the smooth surface and take a deep breath.

The urge to call Edward is unbearable. My finger hovers over the number two button. I had programmed him into speed dial months ago and hadn't used it since. The wind is picking up and I begin to feel the cold. _I could call Charlie…but I don't want to call Charlie. I want to call…_my thoughts trail off and I fix my eyes on a spot in the distance. Suddenly I slam my finger into the button and shakily raise the phone to my ear. _Just to hear his voice_... The phone rings 3 times, my heart beats so loudly in my ears I can hardly hear the ringing. 

_Four…five…_I count the rings. _Six…_ It stops ringing and goes to his voice mail. I hang up quickly regretting ever making the call. _Stupid, stupid, stupid!_ I push the phone back into my pocket. Ill just walk home! I tell my self stubbornly. Some time alone with my thoughts could be good for me. I cross the parking lot and step onto the field. The grass is frozen and makes a crisp sound with every step. I smile to myself. A quiet rumbling catches my attention and I turn around. My heart skips a beat as I watch the silver Volvo roll quietly into view.

I can't move. My limbs feel numb. Part of me wants to run to him, throw myself into his arms, but I know I can't. I stare as the volvo parks expertly along side the curb. I feel like I'm about to faint.

I remember very clearly the last time we had an actual conversation.

"It's too dangerous Bella. We can't do this." At first I had argued.  
"No, we can Edward I'll do what ever it takes to make it easier for you."  
"Bella! It's not about what's easier for me. It's about what's safer for you." I pretended to accept this and looked into his smoldering eyes.  
"We can still try to be friends Bella." However the key word was 'try'. We had tried. Tried and failed. I couldn't handle it. I couldn't get over him when he was constantly around me, dazzling me at every turn. I told him to give me space. That I would talk to him when I was ready. He nodded and left without complaint but I could see the pain in his eyes as I fought back tears and told him I needed time without him. He could clearly see the pain in mine.

Getting over him was impossible, but I worked on hiding the hole in my chest. Some days it was more difficult than others. When I attempted to talk to Jessica about it, she scoffed and reminded me that we had only dated for a month, to get over it. I decided I wouldn't talk to her about it because she clearly had no idea how I felt. Jessica was fickle, she liked a different boy every day and when she ran out of boys to like, she looped back around to the first.

I had dated Edward for a month, but there was something about him. Something that told me he was important. He was something I need in my life. Love is a tricky word and calling my emotion love seemed rash, but I was starting to believe that love was the correct word for how I felt.

I was constantly trying to gain the courage to say something to him. To bring him back into my life somehow but to be honest, I was a coward. At one point I had made the decision to go say 'Hi' to him in the cafeteria. I walked half way from my table to where he stood but turned right around and sat back down at the table, my head in my hands. I could see him smiling as I pretended to be interested in what Jessica was rambling on about.

I eye the Volvo now. My heart racing. Why is he here? I imagine what he will say. The sound of his voice. My thoughts come to a screeching halt when the door opens and Edward doesn't step out. The muscular boy that steps out of the car is most certainly not Edward, it's Emmett. The aching hole had dulled to a low throb over the past weeks, but seeing Emmett's large frame getting out of that Volvo the hole begins to ache more than it did before. It must show on my face because I can see Emmett frown.

"Need a ride home?" My started filling with tears.  
"No. I'm fine." I turn quickly, trying to hide them. Walking fast across the field. Large snow flakes start falling and by the time I am half way across the field the ground is half covered by them. It's slippery now so I slow my pace. I don't realize it but Emmett is right behind me. When he speaks I jump.  
"Bella. Let me give you a ride home."

"No. I said I'm fine." The cold is making it difficult to cry, the tears fade back into my eyes but I am still in pain.

"Bella. Come on. If you don't let me give you a ride home I am going to walk with you, all the way there." He says this as if it is a threat. I could care less actually. I ignore him. The wind picks up creating flurries of snow flakes making it difficult to see. The darkening sky isn't helping either.  
"Come on Bella." He is still a few feet away. I screech to a halt and take a few steps so I am right in his face.

"I said. NO." My blood is pounding in my ears. Why won't he leave me alone!

Without warning his eyes glaze over and seem to change color, they turn from a dark amber, to almost black. The wind whirls the snow around me. Cautiously I step backwards, nervously watching Emmett. He stops moving and is taking deep breathes, a contemplative look on his face.

I figure it's unimportant so I turn and keep walking. I am stepping hard on the ground…too hard, my foot slips out from under me and I fall but I never collide with the frozen ground. I am suspended in Emmett's strong arms. He is inhaling deeply right next to my ear.

"Uh, thanks." I say and try to keep walking. Before I have time to register what is happening Emmett's teeth have sunk into the soft flesh of my neck. I gasp in pain and shock. My heart skips a beat and I managed to squeal "Emmett!" He grunts and pushes me onto the ground running away, upwind of me.


	3. Regret

**So this is back to Emmet's pov, just so you know :) Hope you enjoy it.  
**  
"I ask you to prevent Alice's vision, to make sure Bella isn't hit by the car, and this is how you do it!" Edward's voice fills the room with anger as he yells at me.

I struggle to respond but my mind only races between 'It was an accident' and 'she tasted so good'. Edward glares at me as if he's hoping I will burst into flame. He smiles crudely when he hears me think this. "That's exactly what I'm hoping" He growls like only Edward can.

Bella's body tenses with life and Edwards at her side at once.  
"Can we reverse it Carlisle?" The anger is lost from his voice, he almost sounds as if he's about to cry. All the anger towards me has seemingly vanished, its as if he's forgotten what I've done, but I know he hasn't.

"We might have been able to suck the poison back out, but it's too late now, it has reached her heart." As if on cue Bella twists violently under Carlisle's restraint screaming at the top of her lungs. Edward cringes back, unsure of what to do.  
"Help her Carlisle! Please!" Bella's arms flail and he grasps her hands in his to calm her. "Please." He breathes again. Bella struggles to free her hands from Edward's cold grasp and Edward is forced to release her. If he didn't, she would break her hands trying to free herself from his iron grasp.

Carlisle can't do much, once the poison has entered her heart there's no stopping it. He injects some morphine in attempt to dull the pain even though we don't truly know if it works at all, Bella doesn't even notice the needle going into her body. Either the morphine is taking effect or her muscles are too tired to flail anymore. She stops moving, but continues to yell and cry. The tears mix with the spatter of blood on her cheek, I watch them fall grimly to the hardwood floor. Edward wipes the tears away carefully with his fingers and once again holds Bella's hands in his own. She is too tired to resist.

"There's nothing else we can do Edward," Carlisle places a firm hand on Edwards shoulder. "She's becoming one of us."

Edward shakes his head in denial. "I wish she didn't have to experience this. This pain. She deserves a real life Emmett. A human life. I managed to pull myself away from her, to give her that chance, and you wrecked it all within a matter of seconds!" He's standing now and moving towards me.

I look at the ground. _I don't mind being what I am. It's not so bad._ I think to myself, fully aware that Edward is listening to my every thought. _Well now you can have a normal relationship Edward. You can touch her without breaking her. You can have her forever; you can have her in more than one way._ I directed my thoughts towards him as if I was speaking. He's about to protest but I can see it in his eyes. He wants this just as bad as he doesn't want it. 

_The month you were with Bella you were happy, we all noticed it. For the first time in years you smiled and you laughed. When you forced yourself to leave, you lost all of that happiness, you went back to the old Edward, only you were even more depressed than before. You could have had her, and you knew it, but you let the selfless part of you take control, you left her for her own sake. Be selfish for once Edward. Be happy that you will be able to have Bella, forever._ He reads my thoughts and shakes his head softly, turning back to Bella. _At least he doesn't seem to want to kill me anymore_. I think to myself, smiling slightly.

"We'll see." He mutters without removing his gaze from Bella's pained face. "You know what I find hardest to deal with. Bella knew very little of what we are, and I am regretting keeping her in the dark for so long. She didn't know what would happen when you bit her. She had no idea what was happening to her. She didn't even have a choice. If I was going to turn her, I wanted her to know. I wanted her to be able to tell me, she wanted to be with me forever too. What if she doesn't. What if she becomes one of us and then leaves?"

**Review plz ! :D**


	4. Changes

Bella's body has been limp for way too long. We all know it and most of us have accepted that she may not make it through the transformation. Carlisle has been desperately trying to figure out what is happening, and Edward has been a statue at Bella's side for the past week. He won't talk. He won't hunt. He won't do anything. My eyes shift back to the TV as a picture of Bella flashes onto the evening news. A wave of guilt hits me as the picture changes to Charlie standing in front of his cruiser, trying to avoid the cameras and microphones, and the never ending questions about Bella's mysterious disappearance. I leave the TV and head to towards the room Bella lays in.

"Edward, bro, you're eyes are lookin kinda mean, maybe you should go out, catch a mountain lion or something." His only response is a low growl, telling me to leave the room before he makes me. "Suit your self, but I'm not sure you'll be able to last much longer." I leave him alone and head into the kitchen where Esme and Carlisle are talking quietly.

"Are you sure there's nothing you can do? Oh, that's just so sad, I liked Bella. She made my Edward so happy." She sounded like she would cry, but I knew she couldn't.

"Carlisle." I had to do something. I was the one who started this, after all. "You have got to get Edward to hunt again. He's going to shrivel into nothing if he keeps at this."

"Believe me Emmett, I've tried. He's very stubborn about this." He looks down at his hands. "Well just have to see. He'll be fine for another week. As long as he doesn't go out in public, but if he's still like this, we will have to do something." He gets up and walks into the room with the monotonous sounds of different monitors beeping and buzzing as they keep Bella's body alive. I lean against the counter and listen to Carlisle attempt to get Edward to move from Bella's side.

"Edward, I'm sorry. Her body isn't taking the venom like a normal human body. It's stopped her heart, but it hasn't caused the usually changes yet, and you have to understand that this may never happen.

"Is she in pain?" I haven't heard Edwards voice in so long, it comes as a shock to hear it so low, and so pained

"I can't honestly say whether she is in any pain or not." Carlisle's voice is so low I have to strain to listen in. There's a very loud crash and I rush to the door to see what happened. A chair is lodged in the drywall. Edward is standing. Staring straight at me.  
"YOU!" He's so angry his body is actually shaking. _Shit_, _He's going to kill me_. "You did this to her! Look at her! If she doesn't make it through this…" His dark eyes bore into my own and I know exactly what he is threatening to do. A monitor beeps loudly, a beep we all haven't heard in a very long time. Carlisle is there instantly, listening close.

Edward crouches over her, "Bella..." He whispers softly. He studies her face, looking for any sign of change.

"What's happening?" I ask from the doorway. Too nervous to take any step that brings me closer to Edward.  
Carlisle speaks up, "That was monitoring her brain waves. Something happened. She thought something." his voice is hopeful as he watched the machine, waiting for another beep.  
I notice that Alice and the others have entered the room behind me, staring anxiously.  
"She thought something? What could she possibly be thinking?" She says curiously from behind me. We all stand in silence staring, waiting for it to happen again.  
"I wonder what she was thinking." Esme muses, and that's when Edward speaks up.

"I heard her. I heard her thought…She thought of me." A faint smile tugs at the corners of his lips.


	5. Destruction

I think back to that rainy in Forks when Bella first arrived. The day Edward fought back the urge to kill her and began talking to her. The things he used to say to us; the wholeness that he felt in his life. Then I remember the day Alice saw him telling Bella what we are. Rosalie was furious, I had to pin her to the ground to prevent her from tearing Edward into a million tiny pieces, but the rest of us were happy for him. We were happy that he had finally found someone. He told her what we are, that we are vampires, he told her we drink blood, but that we limit ourselves to the blood of wild animals but he stopped there. He didn't want to frighten her anymore than he thought he already had. But I could see it in her eyes. She wasn't afraid, she wasn't even nervous. She was utterly fascinated.

"You heard her thought, Edward?" Alice squeals excitedly from behind me breaking my train of thought. Edward looks at me, I know he was following my thoughts, but his expression is hard to read, his eyes are guarded.

"Edward, the reason that you could never hear her before must be some sort of barrier; it must be able to block the venom too…and now the venom is slowly breaking the barrier down," Carlisle muses, staring in disbelief at Bella's face. No one speaks. We are motionless, waiting for another sign that Bella will pull through.

An entire ten minutes passes before we start to disperse. I'm the last to leave the room and as I walk out the door Edward leans forward and grabs hold of Bella's unmoving hands. They look so small and fragile intertwined with his.  
"I'm so sorry Bella." His voice is less than a whisper. He focuses on her face, as if hes listening for any trace of thought. As I step out the door I hear him begin to quietly talk to her.

I head upstairs quickly to find Rosalie. I need her right now. I have betrayed my brother, I have nearly killed the love of his one hundred year long life, Ive destroyed his happiness, if I was Edward, I would have ripped me to shreds by now, but he has more self control than I do. He always has.

"Rose?" I say softly as I enter our room. The door swings open to reveal her standing in front of the full length mirror, but she doesn't answer me. "Rosalie?" I say again. Still no answer, she fixes her already perfect hair and continues to stare at herself in the mirror. Carefully, I stand behind her and push a strand of hair off her neck, and lean to kiss her. My lips have hardly made contact when she spins around and pushes me across the room; I hear a loud crack as my body slams into the wall. "What the hell!" I say as I examine the damage to the wall. There's an 'Emmet' shaped dent in the drywall. Esme would be so upset, but then again, she might take it as an opportunity to redecorate.

"Why did you do it?" She demands. "Why did you bring that wretched human into our home?"  
"I already told you, it was an accident! I couldn't just leave her laying there."  
"Yes, you could have. Or, here's an alternative…you could have NOT bitten her!" She gives me an angry stare and turns to the window. "You really need to start using your brain." She mutters as she opens it. I rush forward and push it closed again.  
"Rose! What's going on?"

"You destroyed her life Emmett. You destroyed her! And the worst part is, she had no choice. You know how I feel about that. You know that if I had the chance I would have chosen to stay human, over all of this!" She spits the last few words at me like its an insult.

"You'd rather be human than have what we have? If it wasn't for you, Rose, Id be dead." My heart may not be beating but it feels like it's in a vice. She avoids looking me in the eyes as I try to grab hold of her hands. "Baby?" I say feebly, but she doesn't say anything. She pulls her hands from my grasp and makes her escape out the window. I feel so many thing at once. I want to chase after her, to apologize untill she forgives me but at the same time I want to make her see it my way, to make her beleive that being what we aren't isn't as bad as every one seems to think. But most of all I want to crawl in a deep dark hole somewhere, and never come out.

Not only have I ruined Bella's life, I have ruined my own. By brother hates me, I've put a huge burden upon my family and now the most important thing in the world to me has literally gone out the window.

**REVIEW PLEASE :D :D :D :D :D I love reviews :D**


End file.
